Thursday, October 2, 2008

Why?

Lately my days are filled with a question that children usually ask, "Why? . . . Yes but - Why?"

Oh my bible reading has really convicted me lately between the what may and can seem like like mundane 'daily' routine. Is it barometric pressure changes in the seasons that effects everyone? Is it the economy? Is it the 'election 2008? Is it . . . (you fill in the blank)?

But as I have been reading I realize it is a condition of the heart trying so hard to be filled with everything but what truly matters. A life of Truth, through the GRACE and MERCY of Jesus Christ the ONLY WAY to truly LIVE! YIKES . . . did I say that? Yep I did.

Oh our home has been on kind of a roller coaster (of majority female emotions at every level -or us anyway) but I realize that it is because all of our walks with the Lord are maturing at different levels which can cause unnecessary impatience with those we love the dearest. (Boy is Satan alive and well, isn't he.) My heart breaks because every morning we sit down and have a family devotion but boy have we been not sincere from the heart. Emily asked my just tonight, "Mommy, what?" to which I asked "What do you mean Emily?" she then was quiet for a moment that seemed like an eternity and replied " - things are just different lately, Mommy. I just don't understand . . . " 'WHAT?' " She made me think. She said that she was sad that our family doesn't seem right. Why we don't act like we really do "Love Jesus this week - we are . . . well not showing LOVE and getting really unkind here at home." Well if that didn't scream OUCH!!! :-( I gave her a huge hug and said, "Emily, I Love You and everyone - Thanks for caring enough to share your concern. :-) Let go to bed - okay?" sending her back to bed a third time with another hug and kiss.

It is true. lately . . . we are being tested. WHY? Yes, but Why?

Because he, the Lord Jesus Christ loves us and is allowing us to each come to him on our own. You know . . . we are responsible to share the gospel in every aspect but after that we each are only responsible for our own walk with the Lord. So I have been realizing even more - I can't make my girls Love Jesus Christ because it is their choice to truly choose him. You know Sunday night a special young man made a statement, "are we really listening? You know what is our communication like with our relationships? Communication is the Key." As I sat and listened to him than after reflecting on listening to the word of God's truth this last week and listening to her simple evaluation this evening - We all make time for What really matters to us and we communicate clearly with those around that matter. Communication!!! Why? Because it is vitally important to us - That's why.

Why don't we give the Lord that importance? Really. I wonder why or why we don't. People can't seem to live with out our cell phones, IMing, or TEXTing CONTINUALLY but will forget to read the bible at huge segments at a time and then we wonder why we are so out of sorts (so to speak). We will never talk to friends or treat them like we would those we live with but is it okay to communicate frustration and not Love? Those who have been "In Love" . . . do you remember all the efforts made to talk to the one that made us "crazy" in every way and it made us make every attempt possible to keep that relationship going? It made our heart and adrenaline pump! Remember? So Why do we not live that way with the Lord, Jesus Christ? WHY?

Lately this relationship that I have been having has been making me change. Is it good? Yes. Is it easy? No. Why? Because next to him - there is great room for evaluation and true improvement - that makes me grumpy because I am seeing how selfish I truly am and through that discovery He shed some light that that has been my idolatry-(selfishness). YIKES.

"Why? Yes but Why?" Thanks again Emily for allowing me to evaluate after a tough two weeks that it is all about the LOVE of Jesus Christ being my focus for improvement. Time is too short not to accept that and to not communicate with him daily how much I really want to Know him because HE is the TRUTH, the WAY and the LIGHT and no one shall come to the Father accept through HIM! Because He LOVES ME and EVERYONE who is willing to FULLY SURRENDER TO HIM and not our self.

Yes - that is the WHY!!!