I am so amazed at what the Lord is teaching me lately. YES TEACHING me as well as stretching me. I have been praying like a crazy mad woman for him to give me a love for others that not even I could or even can comprehend. Boy has that been eye awakening. Why? Because true love, REAL steadfast, bed rock foundational LOVE is not in our grain naturally. Oh sure we THINK we know about LOVE but that is so NOT TRUE!
Not true? Yes, not true. From the time of conception where my; really OUR, life began, I/we am/are sinners. We live in a fallen world. Face it. But love is possible in only ONE. I thought I knew what Love is or even about love "but NOOoooooo". The more I try to love the harder it really is. Let me "try" and articulate it from a simpleton kind of mind.
I love because I care. ok. I love because we all want to be loved. Right? ok. I love because my Marmie loved by example. Praise the Lord. ok. I love because I was shown love in a tender hug, (Thank You Marmie) even with those who are "uncomfortable" being hugged later discover they need love through a simple hug. ok. I love because I always wanted and desired Daddy to tell and encourage me with a simple "I LOVE YOU HITA." ok, Fine. I thought love was pretty simple when I accepted Jesus Christ into my heart and with my life and the new decisions. I thought I understood. But the greatest love??? "Whoa Nelly," it is just not really totally something to fathom. It is the hardest to really apply. That is where it all began, March 18, 1984 on a very cold Sunday night. I don't know how many times I have read these words and tried to apply them.
"But I tell you who hear me: LOVE your enemies, DO GOOD to those who hate you, BLESS those who curse you, PRAY FOR those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. GIVE TO everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. DO TO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO TO YOU!!! . . . But LOVE your enemies, DO GOOD to them, and LEND TO them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be SONS OF THE MOST HIGH, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. BE MERCIFUL, just as your Father IS MERCIFUL. . . . . FORGIVE, and you WILL BE FORGIVEN. GIVE, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to YOU." Luke 6:27-ff NIV
Awhhhh, The "golden rule" taught to me by my family and reinstated in Mr. Baloney's classroom. "Sure, no problem." I don't have any enemies. Right? You see, when I started living along side with the creator, I realized step by step through the years, Love can hurt. It is risky. It is captivating when it is outside the family inner circle, and interest of relations to be developed. It is a . . . um . . . lust (some may think I am just admiring or noticing). Because our 'feelers' peek in an interest of another individual, it's still lust that brought the attraction. Then it creates an attraction to show interest. You know gals a hot iron warming up to a "ZING" and guys a "LIGHT SWITCH" simply on/off attraction. Butterflies flying like mad. Best foot forward alerts. Instantaneously ~ this is love ~ feelings caught up in the emotion.
Exponentially, I knew what I DIDN'T WANT! Therefore when love came outside of family; that is when I started to realize that I don't really know anything about it. Don't misunderstand, please. I Love my family (Bloodline) and my In-Loves (marriage line) and my daughters. It is definitely through them that I am still to this very day being transformed daily with true love, sacrificial selfless expression. But LOVE, "TWUE WUVE" is an attachment through commitment. OUCH, is that hard for some to hear? I loved Beth Moores' quote (slight paraphrase), "No one will love Keith more than I have loved Keith. I will love him more than anyone will EVER love him. And no one will ever be more angry with Keith or he with me than . . . . . . (a pause with a tap on the table as the laughter of relational experiences rumbles in and throughout the arena) EVER, EVER, EVER." We are human. We love because we want to be loved back. We expect. Don't we? That is why the gospels are so amazing. It's easy to love when things are going "our way" or with or to others that we "want" to love and with those that are not difficult to love. But AGAPE attachment love is filled with no selfish ambition or vain conceit. It is laced and intertwined with forgiveness, not running away to get the "next feeling of Love" when trouble comes my way, or the first or only argument or the literal feelings diminish and seem to vanish. Girls/Guys are you glad that Jesus Christ doesn't love us on "mood swings" through the turn of the on/off light switch? No! We LOVE because HE FIRST LOVED US from the beginning of T-I- M-E; and quite frankly STILL DOES!!!!
My heart through love is growing still and does has joy, peace, wounds with hurts & scars from loving so deeply. My love for Parents, siblings, my lover, my children, friends, saints and those who scripture calls my enemies still remains. True Love is for the taking and it requires much effort that puts them before myself at all costs, I just need to remember to daily yield it with the King and His example to LOVE. Who knows maybe just maybe it will take me to my death when I finally Love like HIM as best possibly on this side of HEAVEN.
Especially when it isn't the easiest but is still called