Thankfulness

Today another beautiful sun raise shinning through our windows while the chill is held at bay with a slight morning fog wafting its way around the earth like a thin batting layer awaiting a quilt pattern.

The bustling of girls giggling and the hums of whispers about the goodies that appeared after their eyes grew weary with Mr. Sand Mans' dust. They try to contain their over zealous excitement and pitter patter rapidly down the stairs.

The painted frosted east bedroom windows show a dusting of prisms upon two other precious loves of our home. It is time to rise. Three eager and creeping around trying to keep quiet and two others trying to keep under the covers just a bit longer before coming out a resembling bear in a deep hibernation lasting only 8-10 hours although it should have been like an entire winters slumber. Sleep for me . . . not easy this morning. Too excited to see what the new day holds for our family of seven. Last we were divided in the night; one, two, four all in different locations physically but tied in unity of bloodline.

Kent, and the three "babieeeessss" at home holding down the fort. Mya and Tia in Peoria Illinois on an adventure learning from THE NATIONAL MISSIONARY CONVENTION - seeds being sown deep in their spiritual soils waiting to germinate. My heart is pondering theses things while sitting at The XC (cross country) Banquet of Mya's Senior Year (with out her even present.) Eager to serve one last time at the close of a season with these families I've grown to appreciate and love over the past six years. I am THANKFUL!

Thankful to see three of the four faces that have grown up since fourth grade together and over the coarse of time remained in contact with one another. Now these XC (18) Seniors where 10 of them have run together ever since Jr high anticipate the evening to share what they are thankful for. As I listened to their (17) speeches and occasionally laughing my head off hysterically, or wondering deeply, and weeping only once (it is hard to believe - I KNOW- but true) when John Bauchman spoke. Thankful that John was very transparent and how deeply he appreciated his parents and his grandparents for their Legacy; tough but sincere - I wept only then.

Yes I am thankful! He taught me something last night. That being real with those you Love means the world. I watched each of his family members. His little sister crawling on the floor under the table to whisper to their mom after he was finished, "He appreciated and said he LOVED ME!" with a very large grin and nod of her head. His brothers and Mom laughing with all the rest of us because of some rough lessons learned through them this senior year; then his parents and grandparents eyes glistening when he shared his Love and appreciation for them. But the most moving was watching them when he and his parents connected even more because of their unending support for John and ALWAYS being there. He noticed their love for him through their support. WOW! He and His Dad connected in a way that belonged to Just the two of them - MOVING.

Me? Thankful. For what? For the Lord, who gave and continues to give me new sights to see how precious the life he has granted me with. For dieing on the cross for me Jesus, THANK YOU!!! Last night because John was Real, I am going to take the time to tell my folks the "WHYS'" of my heartfelt thanks in the ways they allowed me to grow through the best that they knew how to give and offer. I am thankful that through them life would challenge me to search out God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.

Thankful because of John, I also will share with the girls how special they are to me and why. Thankful for my spouse ("KENT, I LOVE YOU!") and with out him . . . where would I be challenged? Thankful for his humility even when others treat him unkindly and yet he doesn't retaliate or shoot off his mouth. Thankful with how he displays an example for me in my spiritual walk; because He fears and reveres the LORD before myself or any man. Thankful for a man who studies scripture fervently and is NEVER seeking attention of others like so many other people. Thankful because Kent is ALWAYS LISTENING, truly listening to others without any hint to "Show how much he knows" or "trying to be in the limelight seeking praises of 'men'" instead of the praise of the LORD. Thankful because Kent is quiet but genuinely caring for the 'untouchables or eggers' (extra GRACE required) personalities. Thankful because Kent you live by example, not trying to show people up, and knowing your are being held accountable to God for your life. Thankfulness for your patience and love while following your calling.

Lord Thank You for the brothers and sisters in Christ who live their lives with all their heart by shedding some light as an example for me. I am thankful for what you desire and for what is the best for the Kingdom. For I am STILL learning and growing.

So John B., as a young man, Thank You for YOUR presence and through another illustration in a speech last night that made me appreciate those whom I am thankful for.

speechless - a locked time capsule

Young, small full of life.
stranger holds tight
looking into one anothers eyes.

Locked
souls are touched

Eager to please . . . and full of adventure
wonder. awe.
why?
small. compared. alone.

busy in thought
why?
hurt. quiet. feverish searching.

discovery

adventure arising
awe. wonder.
risk. silence. ponder. death.
leave. a different path chosen
step of faith. risk. what is there to loose.

Life begins

Love discovered
Love questioned
Love found

True Love
Different ~ FOREVER
a sponge. unquenchable thirst. driven hunger

Pioneer
Settlers arise
second generation life given
Pioneer plows harder ~ never regrets
Love IS enduring

Love IS given with insurmountable cost
price unfathomable
gift accepted, humbly the head is bowed

Life reflected

SPEECHLESS like a time capsule locked
opened with the arrival
PRAISE with all Eternity
Home

"Let all those who seek You rejoice and be glad in YOU; And let those who love Your salvation say continually, 'Let God be magnified!' " Psalm 70: 4

tick tick tick tock . . .

Time is oozing slowly. Out comes the warmth of the day with a grey overcast. The trees squeak with groans of agony like an elderly pair of hands aching from the spell of arthritis and twisting the joints beyond control.

Aging. TIME is but a midst. Our age process quickly here and quickly lived. Now age is a precious commodity. When a child we wish it away. When teens we can wait to "be adults". As young adults, ready to turn the world upside down with a feverish passion. In the thirties contemplating change. Forty and fifties appreciating what matters. Sixties and reflecting. Seventies and eighties where did the time go? Time. Enjoy the present because the Lord gave it as a PRESENT for you to enjoy for the moment because the present quickly changes to the past. T - I - M - E . . . . today was sweet to live it with Kent on his day off. Gaze deeply into the pools of wonder in the golden rod hues surround by a misty blue pair of eyes that knew she was loved. To make our favorite homemade chocolate chip pancakes, listening to Faith's Friday devotion, sing with the sweet harmony of our family as Haddy smiled, giggled and clapped on beat mouthing her praise. Eating together one more TIME before all departing out the front door. Standing out doors as the leaves were cleaned out of the gutters. Talk with a dear sister in Christ trying to re-assure her that the Lord IS in control of her business and set up a prayer vigil walk through her shop. Tick, tock, tick, tick, tick, tock - - - The clock of the Lord is worthy to be praised.

As the girls all came home then one by one left again with a friend -they each stepped into their time captured moments. Mya drives away, Emily packs an over night bag, Kent goes to the library to study, Faith grabs the phone and leaves to skate and Tia gets ready to Cosmic bowl the night away. Each of them added to their lives another set of memories in some way or another. Their TIME . . . is sweet and I cherish every moment to see the sparkle of what they received.

Indian Summer a good laugh

Leaves, leaves, leaves. It seems so funny to be "raining leaves" all around us. What is so ironic is the bustling of the wind blowing; the Indian Summer permeating in its' warm spell so late. This Indian Summer ~ Early in November, is making my once close to completely dead flower garden start to become rather confused and bloom one more time an aromatic set of rose clusters as if they were waking up early in Spring. But all the leaves of the neighbors trees are back & seem to be invading our porch, steps and street, and what seems to be just around our three vehicles! ;-) Hahahahah hahahaha

After a continuous sneezing spell that sent me reeling into the house "ahhhh cheeee, ahhhh cheee, AHHHH CHoooooo!" After five mountainous, monster sized bags later the yard looked very groomed before we left to Illinois :-) . All was in place. Ready to depart to family in the east. This Indian Summer ~ It gave Kent a time to just THINK while laboring to gather the leaves from the five neighbors trees, who seem to be VERY fond of OUR "greener grass, treeless, leafless front yard property while desiring to share the wealth of their fruit. ;-P Only to come home late Friday evening and discover and giggle to see . . . their sharing hadn't stopped. The Oaks, Maples and Cotton Woods all desiring to blanket the yard. Yes sireee, the trees seemed to act like a well planned quilters guild ready to lay their creation on the loom; tight and taught with the batting ready to receive every patch work and stitch, yielding mostly browns and a few golds. However, the breath of the air plays & desires to tease the yard and redesigning it's pattern continually before yielding to be a fixture of permanence or being combed with a raked or even gathered to be stuffed in a blue bag resembling a large body pillow (a trash bag really) to line the back yard/garage trash receptacles. The sneezing begins again! Yikes!

Yes it is time to start re stuffing the the bags . . . and enjoy the fact that God is perfect and we are thankful that our health is good enough to be able to even allow us to work in the last warm spell of 2009's Indian Summer in NOVEMBER.

With the whirling of the street cleaners coming by in a tyme of 4/4 slowly washing the streets of the leaves that surround our cars before long. Or maybe the forcasted "showers" will bath the newly sealed streets and the small little streams will wash them along to a different ending, with not a trace of evidence of a single tree bearing and sharing it's abundance with us this years not once, twice but thrice.

Here is to Fall ~

Think, Think, THINK . . . I think

Denial. Interesting isn't it. What is denial? The act of saying that something is not true. Act of saying that one does not hold to or accept. a refusing. a refusing to acknowledge. self denial. "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the WHOLE WORLD, yet forfeits his SOUL? . . . " So why do we play "keep up with the JONES' " game?

Okay . . . I know everyone deals with it "keeping up with the Jones'" in the western culture; or the desire to fully living the "American Dream". But the American Dream . . . is not really any dream worth achieving really other than to freely worship the one and only TRUE Savior. Jesus Christ. To follow him at all cost - really? self denial? Refusing what? SELF? Yes. Picking up my cross daily is a huge effort to put others interests before my own. My impatience often gets the best of me. Or how about my competitive spirit (in some way or another there definitely is one) that battles to walk in true humility. The proverbial grass ISN'T greener on the the other side really because then I am looking back and seeing that the grafted sod did catch hold & is growing. I don't desire to forfeit what really matters I mean what REALLY MATTERS.

I've been thinking, thinking, and THINKING. Ana, why is it that we as a culture try to make the gospel more palatable? Or watered down so "NOT to OFFEND anyone?" I've been wondering about Jesus approach. He didn't seem to do that. He told the TRUTH in LOVE. Both together, direct. I remember when we did our first couple of ministries it was so very tempting for me to desire to be every persons chum, lower the bar so that others could attain "Christianity" easily. But one wise individual told me not to lower the bar but to reach down and help pull others up to God's standards. Was it hard? Yes. Did I want to fudge and bend differently? Yes, because it was easier; Wasn't it?! NO. Now 22 years later . . . . God's ways are never wrong but the world YIKES IS! Let me explain.

See the world and all it's lures give temporary pleasures. It Looks appealing, is not so difficult. Gives immediate gratification. Who's it gunna hurt - nobody. The world appeals to all the senses and tends to be subjectively driven. Only to leave individuals with an odd void, a type of hole. It tends to be all about "ME". But when really looking for true filled gratification it comes by being committed to giving.

Giving.
Self denial = selfless servitude
Humility = not needing others to recognize
reach out to others that CAN NOT reach back
LISTEN = Less of "imparting MY knowledge" dispensing
Actively SERVING
Giving!

It's time for me to learn and apply and GO!